Have you ever noticed just how much time there is in a day?
Before you wonder if I’ve lost the plot, let me explain…. I am, most of the time, busy. I rush to and fro, doing things, organising things, going places, etc. etc. However, at the moment, I cannot. I am in a situation where resting and relaxing are the order of the day – where resting and relaxing are about the only things I can do.
This is only a temporary situation, I hasten to add, but it will last for most of the summer. From now until probably mid to late August I’ll have to stick rigidly to a regime of relaxation and recovery. And it’s already driving me potty.
I’ve been sitting in my garden watching the world pass by, listening to the buzzing of the bees and the soft rustle of swaying trees in the breeze. I occasionally leaf through a book, or shuffle my chair either into a patch of sun if I’m chilly or a patch of shade if I’m too warm.
Several apparent hours later, when I’m ready for a change of scenery, I’ll head inside – only to find that I’ve been sat in the garden for 20 minutes at best.
I’m trying to figure out what I can do to fill my time, to make the time pass a little more quickly.
Yesterday I did a wonderful big plan of my vegetable garden, checking out all the crop rotations, working out which beds need manure on them, and went through a couple of sizeable seed catalogues to find varieties that would work in the climate we have, along with working out when I’d have to place my main order. I also read a book, filled a form in and wrote a letter that I’ve been putting off for a while.
So far today I have gently scattered some seeds on my flower borders, in the theory that since I’m not going to be doing any weeding for 6 weeks anyway it’ll give them all the chance to sprout and have sufficiently visible leaves so as to ensure when I do weed I don’t mistake them for something that needs pulling up. I’ve cut some oregano, rosemary and mint and tied them in little bundles on the airer on the back porch to dry, and have had some garlic bulbs dug up for me, which I’ve plaited and also hung up to dry. And I’ve read a couple of books.
I figure that if I continue at this pace I’ll have completely run out of things to do, will have read every book I possess, will have and sketched and painted every view I can see from all corners of my house and garden and will have probably driven my family to the point of wondering what they can slip into my tea by next Tuesday at about 5.15pm.
I just don’t know how to NOT fill my day up. I don’t know how to sit for hours and relax and watch the world and have it actually BE hours and not just a few minutes when boredom drives me to give up.
I’m going to ask my partner, if he has the energy, to try and guide me through a meditation later on, to see if I can get relaxation techniques to actually work rather than just frustrate me. (I find myself trying to work out the key of the music and to write it on a score in my head rather than just listen to it and relax to it, or else trying to guess what the guider is going to say next – I can’t be the only one that does this, can I?)
I think I need some suggestions…. help…. anyone…. please!